Hullo Friends! I, Lord Meowerd Whiskerton III, have recently been informed that a beastly philosophy class has bestowed upon its lowly canine mascot the name of Barktholomeu Woofington IV with the rank of Archduke. This blatant attempt surpass me in the social orders of precedence is an affront to the honor of the proud line of British domestic shorthairs. I am now accepting suggestions on how to respond to the impudent hound. Pip pip!